Productive Extrovert Syndrome

Hi, Mrs. Daniels.   I called you in today, because Timmy has been causing alot of commotion, on the playground, in class, and during the after-school activities.  Usually we are able to spot these “incessant verbal diarheaa” ones in the admissions process and try to alert parents to the inner turmoil that it may be revealing in the child.

“But I don’t understand, he is an outgoing kid. Isn’t this healthy? Expression?” Mrs. Daniels said.

“Here in this school we are very loyal to the unified collective, we believe in cultivating a field of energy, literally, with the power of our students souls and hearts.  We view kids that talk too much, a bit too lost in the illusion of external reality, we are cultivating inner strength and soul power here at this school.  We find that we have lower admission rates to elite spirit task force units for the children whose focus is primarily on rewards in the external world.  We pride ourselves on providing some of the most talented and brave souls in the global fight for the preservation of Gaia and countering the destruction that is levied by the hypnotic frequencies that the CIA beams out via TV, media, music to the population to keep them docile and consuming garbage like rabid dogs. ”

” I would recommend that we put him on Piversol, it will make him quieter and help him to respect the collective more.  I would suggest you begin readying him to transfer to the public school by the fall Mrs. Daniels, I’m sorry.”

This is my proposed addition to the DSM – 6  (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Psychological Disorders):

-Productive Extrovert Syndrome –


Looking down at smartphone during conversation.

-Using the words,  Let’s touch base, or    do you have time to connect?

-Being unable to be in the moment, or being allergic to the present moment, because full presence in heart and mind is extremely detrimental to a corporation’s, grow-to-infinity business model.

-Insistence on having others address you as “Dr.”  in emails, because you spent 5 years being indoctrinated by the Western Psychological (imaginary) models.

-Being dead inside but having your external world’s idols and trophies, be the last flimsy beams or pillars, that are keeping your heart and soul from collapsing and melting down and having the dark night of the soul that you need.


Mind, Soul, Heart are roommates in a 3 bedroom apartment in Brooklyn called Body.

Soul: C’mon John let’s stay in tonight, let’s get centered, invite the divine presence in, bath in some energy and silence, hear where the spirits want us to go. What do you think?

Mind:  Did you see Emily today?  That skirt she had on?  She is so sexy, let’s text her,  maybe we can have a few people over, get some drinks. Get a buzz on…

Heart: Maybe we could have a good cry session, throw on a Jennifer Aniston Rom-Com or Michelle Monaghan even, I know you love her.

Body–  You’re right, Emily was looking good, she did return my gaze today, maybe I have a shot with her.  Ugh, I’m always listening to you soul and heart, I just want to have some fun, can I just play in this realm for once?  Or else why did I incarnate in a human body?  If not to ride the rollercoaster of earthly delights once in a while.

Mind: Ok, Invited Facebook and Twitter over, that’s cool right?  Pornhub texted me, she was looking for something to do tonight, I don’t want to be a dick and not invite her…

Body: Great, so I’m gona go inviting Pornhub to be polite and next thing you know she’s gona bring instagram, snapchat, CNN, TMZ, we’re gona have a full on tween gossip frenzy.  It’s jailbait.

Higher self-  No, we are not opening the door for all this trash, turn off the lights, sit on the pillow and start your deep breathing! Let’s go! Sit your ass down.


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